i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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