You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
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