easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize