Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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