I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
