Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
somebody snuck up and got me drunk
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Randomize
