Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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