so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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