I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
