Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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