He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
