Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize