Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
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