You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
the liver wants what the liver wants
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize