Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
vagina is talking i cant
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Randomize
