Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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