Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Randomize
