All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I want a musical about memes.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
