how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize
