i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
