I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
