I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
