You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
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