We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Randomize
