Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
