hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
