is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
