I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Randomize
