"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
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