ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Randomize