I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Randomize
