If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
of course. lets lasso hookers.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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