Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Randomize
