Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
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