What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
