We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
I AM VODKA MAN
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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