I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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