Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
