at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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