It's like a parade of train wrecks.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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