I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Randomize
