so explain again why im purple
no
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
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