After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
This beer is not sobering me up at all
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
Randomize
