dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
