I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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