so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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