Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
