Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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