i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
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