I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
